I just got back from the ER. Before you start to worry, everyone’s ok. Today, in true Honor fashion, Honor and I spent 4 hours in the ER. For the ONE MINUTE that I went into the bedroom, Honor managed to unzip my purse, get into my container of Ibuprofen and eat them all. I’m estimating that he ate close to 1600 – 2000 mg of Ibuprofen. I wasn’t sure what to do, it seems that I always overreact about these things, so I called Jim who told me to take him to the hospital. Luckily Jen had slept in and was still not at school therefore able to watch Eden.

Honor and I rushed to the hospital, me in yesterdays tee and jeans, Jim’s hat, dress shoes and mascara smeared underneath my eyes. Honor in white jammys that he had managed to spill orange juice on the butt (don’t ask me how), and socks. Now lets talk about our hospitals parking. We have this fantastic hospital here in Grand Junction, it has won all these awards and is ranked really high, but there is NO where to park. What am I supposed to do when my son breaks into my purse and takes all the Ibuprofen and I can’t park anywhere? So I just made my own parking space on the side of the road, I mean, what do they expect me to do?

We arrived at the ER where the great wait began. They really should call it the Waiting Room, not the Emergency Room. He was seen quickly by a nurse and then the doctor saw him probably half an hour later. By then Jim had shown up (having had to park a block away.) The doctor determined that Honor should be ok, but he wanted him to drink some charcoal and stay there for 4 hours under observation. FUN! Jim decided that I would be ok (ha!) and decided to get back to work.

The nurse that brought Honors charcoal must not have children because she mixed the stuff with Coke. What person in their right mind gives a 1 year old boy caffeine? I decided not to say anything, because I didn’t want to wait for her to make new stuff. I don’t know if you’ve ever had to drink charcoal, but the stuff looks disgusting. I wasn’t brave enough to try it. I managed to get about one third of it down him, but let me tell you, that room will never be the same. Honor, a straw and black goo liquid are not a good combination. I forgot to check if some got on the ceiling, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it made it all the way up there. By that point we had at least two more hours of waiting and the caffeine was starting to take effect. The child is bad enough with out caffeine!

I asked the nurse to get Honor some lunch, it was noon and the bottomless pit is always easier to handle when full. We didn’t get his lunch until 10 minutes before the doctor let us go (about 1:30pm). Wanna take a guess at how fantastic my afternoon was. corralling a hungry, drugged boy in a teeny tiny room? I’ve been sufficiently punished for leaving my purse at Honor height. Although, if he really wanted to get it, I know he can find a way. Remember, he is a professional.

Here is the cherry on top of my wonderful day: As we were (finally) leaving the hospital, a woman looked us up and down and told me “That baby should be wearing a hat.” It was 50 degrees out, I was feeling hot in my coat. I hate that I never think of responses until it it too late. To that woman I wish I would have said, “It’s too bad you’re not his mother.”
Do you hear me mean woman??? It’s too bad you’re not his mother and you could have spent 4 hours with him flinging charcoal/coke all over the teeny tiny room, only to leave and smother him with a too warm hat!

So, we’re all fine. Honor is sleeping now. And I am trying to prepare myself for the onslaught that will ensue when he wakes up. We really do need to get that boy a cage.

When Eden was a year and a half, my dad gave her a bundle of Mardi gras beads. They’ve been the favorite toy for all of our little visitors ever since. Lately I’ve noticed that we’ve been missing our beads. Out of 12 strands, there were only two left kicking around the house.

Yesterday, Honor was playing with one of the strands of beads. He came and got me and grunted towards the heating vent. I took the cover off, only to discover that ALL of the beads were laying in the bottom of the heating duct. All of them, in a nice, dusty, warm pile. This child just never stops. I swear, the only time he ever plays with his toys is to stick them in the plant, the toilet, the trash can, and now the heating vent. I just don’t know what to do with him.

And now for a moment of Peanut cuteness:
Today when I was heating the remainder of lunch up in the microwave, Eden grabbed Honor’s hand, bowed her poor little hairless head and prayed for lunch all by herself.

It has begun and I will have to live through 17 more years of it. Today Eden said to me “Honor is touching me.” Who knows what’s next, maybe, “Honor’s looking at me”? or maybe “Honor is on my side”?

Fantastic.

Today my sister came by to take me to the un-named book store that she works for so I could use her discount to buy the new knitting mag, Knit.1. While we were out we stopped by Big Lots to check out their deals. There we bought various kinds of crackers, enchilosa, Knudsen sparkling apple cider for $.99 each and some Little Debbie Snack Cakes.

After that we went to Hobby Lobby to get a bamboo handle for my new purse that I’m knitting.

On the way home we indulged in a Little Debbie Snack Cake and of course we had to share with the kids. I try to limit their intake of sugar, so any kind of sugar that they may get their little grubby hands on, they devour. Honor fell asleep on the way home and this is how he looked when I went to get him out of the car seat.

I wonder what he’s dreaming about?

Last night Eden and Honor were taking a bath. Jim stood guard over them while I folded the mountain of clothes on our bed. We came to this arrangement because if Jim encounters a mountain of clothes on our bed he has this insatiable desire to throw all of those clothes On. The. Floor. Not in a laundry basket, the floor.

Honor was finally banished from the bathtub, I think because Jim was starting to get hoarse from saying “Honor, sit down” every 8.5 seconds. I had to take a break from folding clothes to get him all greased up. This is because his father refuses to touch lotion. On top of that, Honor had a diaper rash and needed some cream on his bottom. (While we’re talking about rashes on the bottom, Eden has been very interested in the fact that Honor has a rash. So the other day after going potty – yes the child actually went potty! – she came out of the bathroom and announced, “I have a RAT on my bottom.”)

I got him all jammied up and went back to my clothes folding while Jim started to take out the trash. Eden was still happily swimming away in the bath. All the sudden I heard a splash and Eden yelled, “Mom! Honor has jammys on in the bath tub.” There Honor stood, in his jammys, sopping wet and yelling. (Notice how he was once again STANDING UP!) The toilet brush was floating in the tub behind him.

I can’t even figure out how he got in there, unless he just jumped head first? I DO know how the toilet brush got in there; every time I turn around he is brandishing it like a scepter! As much as he likes the toilet, I guess it’s fitting. Honor, the King of the Toilet. Maybe he’ll potty train early…..

Yesterday was Honor’s first birthday. I can’t believe that it has already been a year. Just in time for his birthday, he started walking so he spent his day toddling around.

He wasn’t sure wat to think of everyone singing him “Happy Birthday” the whole time he just looked at everyone wide eyed.

I made him a robot cake which proved to be VERY frusterating. I got the idea from a friend on glitter.

I tried using fondant to ice the cake, but the stuff is the most horrid stuff I’ve ever tasted (aside from the little minnow I ate in Africa, but that’s another story.) So I ended up sending Jennifer to the store to buy some powdered sugar at the last minute so I could ice the cake with buttercream frosting. I used the fontant to decorate the cake, but I’m really frusterated that I spent $18 on fondant (this was because our wonderful local paper, the Daily Sentinel, neglected to enclose the Michaels ad containing the 40% off coupon. grr.)

Honor REALLY enjoyed the cake, I think it’s the most sugar he’s ever had. Ever.

So onto his presents…
Cars, Cars and more Cars. But, what more could a one year old boy want?

Here I am with my two little stinkers.

All the kiddos enjoying cake.

One last thing I’d like to say… really this party was a celebration that I made it to one my kids first birthday NOT pregnant!!

Yesterday Honor and Eden thought it would be great fun to play with the bike. I found this out when Honor started screaming. The most I can figure out is that Honor was touching the gears of the bike while Eden turned the pedals.

He got his finger caught between two gears and somehow the chain was also involved in the whole finger smooshing. I couldn’t figure out how to get him out, and was afraid that I’d hurt him worse. All kinds of things ran through my mind: What if it’s stuck in there too long and he loses his finger? What if I can’t get it out and I have to call 911 and he has to stand there for hours while they disassemble the bike? What if it’s broken and I have to rush him to the hospital?

As you can see, I’m a little dramatic. I couldn’t figure out how to get his poor little finger out, so I called Jim who happens to work only 6 blocks away. He told me to calm down and then ran all the way home. In the mean time, I was able to take the chain off the bike and get Honors finger out. It was pretty red and swollen and it broke the skin right at the cuticle. But other than that he was ok. Today it’s just a little red. Poor baby.

Sunday night Honor received his first hair cut. I was so proud that one of my bald children needed a hair cut. I throughly enjoyed it as I know it will be years before Eden needs a hair cut.

It looks much more torturous in picutres than it really was. As you can see, I was holding him (my biggest concern was that grabby pants would reach up and get his fingers caught in the razor.) And Brooke was doing the cutting.

Believe it or not, but Honor’s hair is longer than Brian’s.

It’s not like his hair was too terribly long, but the hair on the sides was so much longer than the hair on the top and he looked like he was a balding old man/clown.

Honor took his first step today. He was standing at Edens bed and just walked towards me! He is already much braver than Eden ever was, he just threw himself into it. What a tuff kid!!

Tomorrow he will be 10 months old. I just can’t believe it. We’re really working with him on saying bite when he wants more food. Right now what he does is just yell. I hope that it won’t be long until he learns how to say bite because I can’t stand the yelling!!!

Today is Honor?s 9 month birthday. I can?t believe he is so old. It seems like Eden’s first 9 months took twice as long as his have. He crawls really well, he pulls himself up on everything, including his favorite thing, the toilet. He has just started to walk around the furniture. He waves bye-bye and says ?ba ba? while waving. He can pick up the cheerios with his thumb and forefinger but is REALLY good and throwing them all over the house. The vacuum bag contains almost exclusively cheerios.

And he has earned a new nick name. Destruct-o-con. While the squirm is still fitting, even more than ever. Destruct-o-con is just more fitting, as my house will attest to. It showed last night and by noon today, you?d never have a clue that it was sparkling clean. None at all.

Oh, well, I love the little destroyer. The cuteness makes up for the cheerio messes.