Recently I started using Pinterest. It’s like a virtual pin board where you can pin things that you love. I usually save photos of things I like to my ipad, or bookmark a post in google reader, but this is a great way for me to collect everything I love/want/am inspired by in one cohesive place. Plus it’s fun to be able to share with my friends.

Do you pin? If so, what do you love about it? Make sure you add me if you do, my user name is pretendsanity.

PS: if you’re interested in joining, I have a few invites I can send out – just let me know.

Once I get something in my head, I get so ridiculous. Someone once described me as tenacious and I think that that is just about perfect. There might possibly be a picture of me next to the word in the dictionary. This weekend I decided that I wanted a new quilt and that I wanted one RIGHT NOW. So I basically locked myself in the house for two days and made a quilt. (And a pair of slippers.)

When the Joel Deeberry fabric arrived at Tangle, I about had a heart attack over the cuteness. In fact, I had to reorder the aqua birds because it sold out in the first week. But not before I saved some for myself. It sat on my sewing desk for two weeks before it turned into a quilt, so really I’m applauding my restraint. The aqua birds and the orange damask are from the aviary 2 line, the dots are Amy Butler.

I wanted to make the quilt simple with big blocks of the fabric. I think the prints show up best this way.

The back was basically an exercise in how I could use up all of the scraps. I paired it with some Amy Butler cream solid. I think I might like the back more than the top.

I quilted each square with a different pattern. My favorite, and the most annoying to do, is the “concentric” squares on the orange damask. I get really lazy when it comes to quilting, so once I started, I had to force myself finish. Shoving a quilt through my little machine is not my favorite thing to do.

Dexter was really “helpful” in making this quilt. I don’t know what it is about this dog that he is drawn to any piece of fabric laying on the ground. He walked all over the back with muddy feet. This morning I came home to find him snuggled under the quilt. He is lucky that he is cute.

I learned a few new skills while making this. First, I discovered how to baste with adhesive spray. I will never again do it another way. This saved me at least an hour. And was SO easy.

The second is how to make continuous bias binding. Were I to not mess it up, it would have saved me tons of time. It’s such a smart method.

The quilt is roughly 60×60 and will find it’s home in the living room where I’m slowly amassing a nice collection of quilts.

The lights go out all around me
One last candle to keep out the night
And then the darkness surrounds me
I know I’m alive but I feel like I’ve died
And all that’s left is to accept that it’s over
My dreams ran like sand through the fists that I made
I try to keep warm but I just grow colder
I feel like I’m slipping away

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today, someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

My whole world is the pain inside me
The best I can do is just get through the day
When life before is only a memory
I’ll wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can’t understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you’ve brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today, someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

Here I am at the end of me (at the end of me)
Tryin’ to hold to what I can’t see (to what I can’t see)
I forgot how to hope
This night’s been so long
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today, someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

-superchic[k]

Tonight was a rough night. The kids, overtired from being up late the night before, decided to push every boundary I had given them. They both completely melted down and I couldn’t help but find myself hating Jim a little for not being here for his kids that need him. It’s hard to live someone else’s consequences.

A few years ago, when I could acutely feel my heart ripping apart, I found this song by Switchfoot that I listened to over and over and over again. I slept with it on repeat in my headphones. Now, every time it comes on, I’m immediately transported to that time. I think sound triggers memory even better than smell.

When the few people who knew what was going on with me would ask how I was doing, I would tell them that there was still a gaping hole in me, the edges were just healing. I remember crying and feeling like there was this vortex in my chest, this sucking wound that just pulled everything into it and out of me. It felt like it would never be filled.

Tonight that Switchfoot song came on my pandora station and, trigger that it is, pulled me in. I realize now that things hurt me… it hurts to see your kids reeling from decisions that are not their own. But I don’t have that gaping wound in me any more. I feel so whole, even when I’m sad or raw. I told my therapist that I couldn’t really tell you how I got here (although I give him and Jesus a lot of credit) but I’m here. I feel healthier than I ever have in my entire life and I’m doing it without my husband.

I am just so incredibly thankful.

Only Hope – Switchfoot
There’s a song that’s inside of my soul
It’s the one that I’ve tried to write
over and over again
I’m awake and in the infinite cold
But You sing to me over and over and
over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
And pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now You’re my only hope

Sing to me of the song of the stars
Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing
and laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that You have
for me over again

I give You my apathy
I’m giving You all of me
I want Your symphony
Singing in all that I am
At the top of my lungs I’m giving it back

You may not know this about me, but I’ve been on this quest for a deodorant that doesn’t have aluminum, isn’t an antiperspirant and actually works. Apparently, that’s really too much to ask!

I have so many tubes of deodorant that don’t work stacked up in my bathroom cabinet… and because it’s hard to find a woman’s deodorant that isn’t an antiperspirant, I even considered switching to men’s. Just what I’ve always wanted to smell like…old spice!

But I’m happy to announce that I’ve finally found something amazing! I read about this deodorant in ReadyMade magazine and had to try it. This stuff has worked through me running 5k’s, I’ve never noticed myself being stinky at the gym or any time since I’ve started using it. Needless to say, I’m completely sold.

It’s definitely different than any kind I’ve tried. It’s a cream that comes in a pot and has to be applied with your fingers. (Which doesn’t bother me at all.) There are powders in the cream so it goes on a little gritty, but I’ve never noticed the grit after it’s been applied. The best part is that it smells amazing.

Deoderant Cream by Soapwalla Kitchen